confidence

Tomorrow I’ll have the hysterosalpingogram done, just to check that my tubes are open and the uterus shows no problems. I miraculously managed to get an appointment straight away. What a relief! I was worried I might have to wait three months. I am quite sure that everything is fine but the clinic want to reassure themselves that I can get pregnant. I realise that what I need most is patience. The statistical chance of conceiving via DI is 10%. This may take a while. I read today that one of the major challenges is to deal with the psychological aspects of infertility. Only, I am not infertile. I must not forget that all these stats are generated from patient data that come to the fertility clinic because they can’t conceive. I can, I know I can.

The next day……..

The procedure was really interesting, probably because for a change you can see what happens. They monitor the uterus and tubes via x-ray while the doctor injects the dye. You can see how it fills the uterus and then flows through the tubes. It’s a beautiful picture with the tubes being very symmetrical and curved, almost art nouveau-style. It didn’t hurt and was very quick, no fibroids, no blockage. All is well.

first clinic appointment

What a anti-climax! After all this waiting for an appointment I saw the doctor for about 5 minutes. He reiterated my medical history, told me that I neither have hepatitis C or B nor HIV, that I had a miscarriage four months ago and now wished to conceive via donor insemination.  He didn’t offer all too much encouragement about getting pregnant naturally (if one can call DI natural). My FSH value were normal at 7, I was ovulating but of course I was almost 40 and at that age fertility declines rapidly every 6 months. (Thanks for taking 3 months to get me to the first consultation!) His recommendation was to refer me to the fertility unit (hang on – I thought I was at the fertility unit?) for more tests and that we tried DI for 3-6 months and then immediately proceeded to IVF. If I didn’t get pregnant within 3 months with DI my chances of conceiving that way were really low and surely I wouldn’t want to waste the time window in which I could still  try IVF.  Of course this wouldn’t be done under NHS. DI is only paid for by the NHS if my partner had poor sperm (no partner – no NHS) and unfortunately NHS would only fund IVF to the age of 38. By the way, had I seen the price list? He handed me a sheet  of paper with prices and pointed out that IVF costs about 4,000 pounds per cycle. DI is bargain with 800 pounds per cycle.  Next I would have to have a hysterosalpingogram to see if my tubes are open. (Of course they are – I had just been pregnant!)  How I love that word, hysterosalpingogram, almost poetic in its complexity. And a consultation with the psychologist at the fertility unit. He gave me a sheet of paper with a phone number to schedule the hysterosalpingogram and said I’d get a call from the fertility unit to setup the appointment with the psychologist. My heart sank when I saw that the radiology unit only has 5 appointments per week, only on Tuesday mornings and that they apologised if this caused delays. Since the test can only be done before you ovulate but after you stopped bleeding  and you can only call when you are having your period and not in advance that makes finding a suitable appointment even more difficult. They reassured the patience that everyone would be seen within 3 months. Can you imagine. Three months! My fertility will be non-existent by then.

I looked up hysterosalpingogram as soon as I got home. Basically a dye is injected into your uterus (that’s the hystero part) and then flows through the tubes (salpingo!) and out the other end. The dye can be seen on an x-ray. It only takes a few minutes and isn’t painful and will reveal if you have any fibroids in your uterus and any blockages in the tubes. I also read that the likelihood of conceiving is higher after having a hysterosalpingogram.  Probably because any possible obstacle has been washed away. I also read that  is only the case when a lipophilic dye is used. Water based dyes don’t show that effect. Unfortunately most clinics use the less expensive water based dye.